Panacea
by baronessie
Summary: Panacea- noun. A solution or remedy for all difficulties or diseases. The experiences Melanie has after Wanda is removed from her body; between chapters 58 and 59. Very canon. Currently being revised for grammatical errors.
1. Chapter 1

_Panacea- noun._

_A solution or remedy for all difficulties or diseases._

Chapter 1

Grief. That was the first thing I became aware of. The blackness pressed in on me— everything was confused—but the grief stood out, overshadowing everything else. What had happened? Where was I? How...? The questions stumbled and meandered idly around my mind as I tried to first comprehend the wrenching pain that tore at my chest.

_My_ chest.

Something about this tugged at my memory—what was it? I focused on the breathing that moved my aching chest up and down, trying to understand. Then I understood; it was not just breath that caused my chest to expand, it was _my_ breath. My own. I could control it. I marveled at this revelation—et my breath stop for a moment just to test this unfamiliar power over my body.

"Mel?"

Something else, something very different from grief, stirred in my heart when I heard the voice. The enveloping darkness began to fade, awareness taking its place.

"Mel? Can you hear me?"

My mind was becoming clearer, and I was becoming aware of myself. I was lying on my back. There was a light somewhere above me, turning my eyelids a faint orange. More was coming back to me now, the vague sense of loss and the strange sensation of control began to piece together, and all too soon, my blissful ignorance was ripped from me as my mind violently collided with ice-cold reality.

"Wanda!" I was too terrified to be shocked that my words—my own words—were coming from my mouth, and that every muscle in my body tensed in anticipation of my command. My eyes flew open and I wrenched my body upwards. But I was disoriented again—my sudden movement made my head swirl, and I recoiled away from the light that hit my eyes. What was I doing? I couldn't waste my time trying to adjust to having control over my own body again. _Where is Wanda?_ I thought frantically. Oh God, please PLEASE let Doc have lied to her. I can't let her die...

I was barely aware of my body shaking until the voice—his voice—spoke again.

"Mel? Mel!"

I felt his hands on my shoulders, shaking me, trying to jolt me into reality. But I was already aware of reality. As my eyes adjusted, they found his face just inches away from my own. A small part of me soared with unthinking delight, but the rest of my mind was miles ahead. Jared was safe, but someone else I loved might not be. I jerked away from his hold and onto my unsteady feet, my eyes roving around the shadows of the hospital room. They found another man standing a few feet away from me, looking slightly shocked at my actions.

"Wanda!" my voice shouted frantically. "Where is she? You didn't... you wouldn't... you can't let her die!" I shrieked, my eyes still darting around, searching for any hint of feathery silver.

Doc opened his mouth, but before he could speak I felt a familiar hand on my shoulder.

"She's fine Melanie, see? She's not going anywhere." Jared's hand spun me around to face him. His other arm, I now saw, was cradling a glowing cryotank. I stared at it for a moment and then closed my eyes, letting the warm relief wash through me as I saw that my friend—my sister—was safe. I didn't care at the moment what had happened, why Doc hadn't let her die... the relief overshadowed everything else.

I remained like that for a few moments, just basking in the absence of the heart-wrenching fear for Wanda's life, until a sensation I could not ignore pulled my eyes open—Jared's hand squeezed my shoulder gently.

When I looked up at him, I saw with a small shock that he looked anxious, almost... nervous. Something rare for him. He stared right back at me, eyes searching restlessly. I realized he was waiting for me to speak. My lips curved up slightly.

"Jared," I breathed. My voice was barely above a whisper, but I heard—and he could, too—everything I wanted to say to him, communicated with that single beautiful word.

"Melanie."

I leaned towards him, my heart throbbing with anticipation. I was vaguely aware of him setting the cryotank down with tender care, but all I could really focus on was his face, his brilliant eyes locked on mine, until our bodies were pulled together as if by a magnetic force. His arms wrapped around me, pulling me closer. I fit my face into the curve of his neck, my hands tracing his jawline, his cheeks, knotting in his hair as I felt the fire between us spark.

I relished the feeling of my control, how my muscles obeyed my every wish. How many times had I ached to reach for Jared since I first laid eyes on him in the caves, only to be powerless against Wanda's stubborn control? And how often had I wanted to be near him, to be close enough to touch him, without her being there between us? Now that the dread of losing Wanda had been lifted, now that I knew she was safe outside my body... I had to admit I was more than ecstatic to have myself back.

As I thought this over, I remained secured to Jared's chest. His hands pressed me gently against him, rubbing the middle of my back as I felt his face bury in my hair. I savored this simple and tender embrace, but the building fire was too much for me to ignore. I needed more of him. Now.

My arms wrapped like a vice around his neck and I pulled my face up until my lips met his. The slower burning suddenly was out of control; frantic desire replaced all else.

I don't know how long we kissed. It could have been days. I could have continued forever; I never would have enough to be fully satisfied, and I could tell he felt the same way. Eventually I broke away, gasping, trying to catch my breath. He kept me tight in his arms; I could feel his warm breath on my skin. I leaned my forehead against his chest as my breathing slowed. He bent his head down to me, his breath tickled my ear.

"Ah, Mel," He whispered. I could hear the tears in his voice. "I missed you."

I laughed a shaky laugh. "I was never gone," I murmured. "Just... a little out of sight." I raised my face to look into his eyes. I saw the moisture building up, threatening to overflow, and I saw my own face reflected in his eyes, tears already sparkling dimly on my cheeks. I was too happy to be embarrassed.

"Ahem," a voice near us said. I regretfully tore my gaze away from Jared's face to see who had interrupted us.

Doc was still standing by his desk. He took a hesitant step towards me. It took me a moment to decipher his expression, why he seemed mildly nervous. Of course I already knew him—had seen him just as clearly as Wanda had throughout all our time in the caves, however, he did not know me. As I watched him take another step, part of my mind wondered idly how the others would react to me. Most (except Jamie, of course) had never seen me separate from the soul who had controlled my body. Would I be welcomed with open arms like the seeker's host Lacey had been?

Doc was now in front of me; I snapped out of my contemplations and unwillingly pulled myself loose from Jared's arms, keeping one of his hands.

"How do you feel, Melanie?" he asked, eyes alight with curiosity.

"Perfect, Doc," I said. He jumped slightly when I addressed him so casually. I tried not to laugh at his reaction.

"You don't feel dizzy, disoriented..." he trailed off.

"No, I'm fine," I assured him with a smile. Jared squeezed my hand gently.

"Well..." he mumbled, searching for words. He must have been expecting me to be like the Healer's host—to be confused and frightened. My apparent ease threw him for a moment.

"What can you remember?" he pressed, regaining his train of thought.

I shrugged. "Everything, really". His eyes widened. "I never lost myself to Wanda, except..." I winced, remembering that blank space after Wanda had seen...

I shook my head, trying to rid myself of the echo of her horror. I glanced up at Jared's face; I could see the mask he used when he was trying to hide a strong emotion. His hand tightened around mine.

My hesitation was very brief. "I remember everything from my life before Wanda, and I was always present in her mind when she was inside of me," I lied smoothly. No need to make Doc feel even worse about what he was doing to those kidnapped souls... however, I could see he had picked up on my discomfort, so before he could question me further, I changed the subject.

"So what happened?" I asked, looking down and briefly touching Wanda's tank with my free hand. "Not that I'm mad, but you gave Wanda your word that you would do what she wanted." I looked questioningly at Doc, who now seemed troubled. His face twisted into a grimace. He opened his mouth to speak but closed it quickly, turning away from me. Jared broke the silence.

"Like I was just going to let her walk away from us," he said, shaking his head and rolling his eyes at the apparent absurdity of the idea. His eyes met mine for a moment before he released my hand and bent down to pick up the cryotank. He gazed down at the glowing red light and sighed. "Ian was right. She is too important to just leave. We need her here. And I..." He hesitated. "She's my friend."

I felt slightly warmed by this admission, but he hadn't really answered my question.

"But what happened, exactly?" I persisted. "Wanda told Doc not to get you until..." I cringed. "Did you know what she was planning?"

Jared grimaced. "Not exactly, but I guessed enough. Why else would she make me wait? I thought it was a little strange that she didn't want me to be there. She's such a selfless little thing. She would never have denied me anything like that unless..." he trailed off.

"Unless she knew you would try to stop her." I sighed. I was grateful that Jared had paid enough attention to her before; he knew her well enough to see through her flimsy lies and excuses. "So you followed her."

"Yes," he admitted. "I, um...convinced Doc to put her in a tank once she was under."

Doc snorted. I looked at him, surprised. He rolled his eyes at Jared before turning towards my confused expression.

"Convinced," me muttered, shaking his head. "I'd say coerced is a more appropriate word."

Jared grinned sheepishly. "Well..." he glanced at me. " 'Convinced with a knife' might be more accurate."

I laughed. Violence: the typical human way to solve a problem. I guess Wanda was somewhat right on that account. I turned to Jared and reached for Wanda's cryotank. He placed it gently in my hands. The outside was warm; I held it against my chest.

"She'll be furious," I sighed, "But I think she'll get over it."

Jared nodded. Doc turned absently and began to clean up his work area.

"So what do we do with her now?" I murmured, looking down at the muted red light of the cryotank.

* * *

Author's Notes

- Before anyone asks, it's pronounced pan-uh-SEE-uh. I apologize for the pretentiousness of the title.

- This is a slight revision of the original story I posted in 2009. I fixed a lot of small grammatical errors and cleaned up some of the wordiness. I hope you enjoy it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"What do you mean?" Jared asked. "We get her a new body, of course."

"Jared..." I hesitated, not sure how to phrase what I was about to say. "I...We have to think about this first. You know Wanda doesn't want to be a parasite. She doesn't want to take some other human's body away from them."

He frowned, then glanced briefly behind him. I followed his gaze; for the first time I noticed someone sleeping on a cot in the corner. Kyle. Jodi's body was in the cot next to him.

"Well... what if there was no human left in the body? What if there was no one to claim it?" he asked quietly. "Jodi hasn't woken up yet. What if she never does?"

I processed this for a moment. "Yes, I suppose you've got a point. Not all humans stay with their hosts. Sunny was in Jodi's body for a few years—Jodi might have completely disappeared in that time. We'll have to wait and see what happens." We both glanced back to the corner where Kyle and Jodi were. Though I had never quite forgiven Kyle like Wanda had, it still made me sad to think that his Jodi might never come back.

"Alright," Jared said. I could hear the sudden businesslike undertone to his voice as he went into planning mode. "So when should we go on a raid for a body?"

"We can discuss this later," I said quickly. Seeing Kyle reminded me of someone who should be a party to this discussion. "I... need to talk to Ian."

Jared tensed. "I'm not sure if that's such a good idea, Mel." He hesitated. "I mean... I don't think Ian would be very happy to see you."

"I know." I sighed. "I still need to talk to him, though. I promised Wanda..."

"Mel..." I saw he was about to protest.

"I can look after myself, Jared," I said firmly. "Ian should have a say in this before we make any decisions. This affects him, too." I squared my shoulders stubbornly.

He sighed. "Well, no need to rush." He glanced up at the cave ceiling; it was still dark outside. "It won't be morning for a while. Are you tired?"

I shook my head. I knew trying to sleep would be a lost cause. "No... I don't really feel like sleeping right now. I'd rather walk around a bit, if you don't mind."

"I don't mind."

He offered me his hand. I hesitated, weighing Wanda's cryotank in my hands. In all honesty, I liked Doc, but I just couldn't bring myself to trust him with the soul I was holding. Instead, I shifted Wanda's tank to one arm so that I could take Jared's hand. We turned towards the exit; Jared took one of the dim blue lanterns from the desk. I paused at the opening to the cave.

" 'Night, Doc," I murmured.

Hand in hand, we walked slowly away from the hospital.

It was a good feeling, being able to control my body again. I wanted to run, skip, and do cartwheels. The only thing keeping me back was something much more important... being with the man who walked beside me. My mind jumped between the feeling of his hand entwined with mine and the feeling of my muscles as they moved by my command. Jared seemed to notice my preoccupation; he didn't speak, letting me contemplate my new freedom. We walked in silence through the tunnel for a long time.

We eventually reached the moonlit main plaza. With no particular destination in mind, we meandered around the edge of the field, now talking quietly. Jared wanted to know more about me and Wanda before we found the caves. I explained the walls I had put up to block my traitorous memories, and how the soul Wanderer coped with my presence. He didn't interrupt; he just continued to listen. We walked on to the eastern field, in no hurry. I reached the point when Wanda had decided to visit her old Healer; Jared was still listening intently. I stopped after retelling her eventual decision to go looking for him and Jamie. He knew the rest; I didn't want to dwell on the memories of us stumbling through the desert.

"Melanie..." Jared finally said in a low voice. "Mel, I'm sorry."

We had paused at the far end of the field. I looked at him questioningly.

He clarified. "I'm sorry for everything I put you and Wanda through before. So sorry." He squeezed his eyes shut. "I was a cruel bastard to Wanda and she never deserved it, never even lifted a hand to defend herself. Just hearing you talk about her... it makes me sick to think that she risked her life to find me and Jamie, and when she got here, all I did was hurt her. I hurt her again and again."

I bit my lip, swallowing against the lump in my throat that the tears in his voice caused. I set the cryotank down at the edge of the field so that I could pull him to me. Both arms went around his neck, and I pushed myself onto my toes so that my cheek touched his. His arms locked around my waist, securing me to him.

"It's okay, Jared. I know," I whispered in his ear, "And Wanda does, too. I can't imagine what it was like for you, seeing me, but not me. Just the soul who controlled my body. I wanted to tell you so badly that I was still there, that I loved you... but Wanda knew you would never believe us, that you would think she was lying to you."

His arms tightened around me. "You don't know how much it hurt when I saw an alien in your body. When I first realized that the seekers had gotten you... I can't even begin to describe what it did to me. To me, you were far worse than dead. I didn't know how to go on knowing what they did to you, but I had to for the kid's sake."

I shivered, despite the fire smoldering between us. "Jamie," I whispered, my eyes squeezing shut. "How..." I swallowed before I continued. "How bad was he when I didn't come back?" Jamie had talked to Wanda a little bit about this a while ago, but I knew he hadn't told her everything. Did I even want to know? I tensed, bracing myself for his answer.

He didn't answer right away. His hand moved up my back, stroking my hair, trying to relax my rigid position. "I never thought he'd get over the loss," he whispered. "It was bad enough that I had lost you, but I had to at least try to hide the pain so that I could take care of him. But Jamie... he just couldn't hide it. I wanted to lie to him, to tell him that you were fine, but I couldn't do it. It would have been so cruel to give him false hope like that."

He pulled his head back so that he could look into my eyes. "That's the other reason I couldn't stand it when Wanda came in your body. It was bad for _me_, but what I though it might do to Jamie..." He stroked my cheek with one hand. His fingers left a trail of fire behind them. I closed my eyes and leaned my face into his hand.

"But it turned out okay, I guess." He sighed. We stood in silence for a moment.

"We worried about that a lot," I said finally. I opened my eyes; he was watching my face with an unreadable expression. "Wanda and I... we didn't think we were going to survive down here. It was bad knowing that we were probably going to be killed, but Jamie..." I shuddered; Jared's arms tightened around me.

"It's all right," he murmured. "You're not going anywhere..." He paused. "And neither is Wanda."

I let him hold me—let the fire between us melt away the frigid echo of anxiety that made my chest hurt. Just like before, this wasn't enough for me. I lifted my face, my nose skimming against his neck, until I found his lips. The slowly-burning fire suddenly erupted—we were soon gasping for breath, but unwilling to stop. It became too much; our lips broke apart. I curled closer to him to compensate, not ready to stop the mutual burning. We were quiet, listening as our breathing began to slow.

I lost track of time. Eventually, I turned my head and saw the luminous red of Wanda's tank out of the corner of my eye.

"I need to talk to Ian."

"Mel..." he began.

"Please, Jared." I pulled my head back so that I could see his face. "It'll be morning soon. I don't want him waking up and not knowing where Wanda is. He'd go berserk." We both glanced up at the mirrors over the field; it had gotten lighter by the tiniest degree. People would be waking up soon.

"Fine," he said, looking down at me. Anxiety creased his face. "But I'm coming with you."

I brushed my fingers against his cheek, trying to soothe him. "Stop worrying."

His lips curved up slightly. "I'm not."

I loosened myself from him and bent to retrieve the tank. I held it with extreme care. When I straightened up, Jared put an arm around my waist and pulled me to his side. We turned and began to walk, leaving the moonlit field behind us.

* * *

AN: This chapter has been revised for grammar.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

I felt strange walking in the caves. I knew my way around as well as Wanda did, however, this was my first time actually going anywhere myself. It was too surreal.

We didn't speak as we drew closer and closer to Ian's room. Jared was quiet. I could only guess what he might be thinking, but I didn't bother speculating. I had too much else to consider. Like what to say to Ian.

How could I possibly try to explain everything to him? I didn't know where to begin. I knew he would be angry... and quite possibly at me. I remembered he seemed to sense I objected to Wanda's plan during her tribunal, but what would he think now that the deed was done? I would just have to explain as best I could. I loved Wanda like a sister. I just hoped that he would be able to see that. But how much else should I tell him? I very clearly remembered Wanda's words to Doc when she named her terms. I didn't know what to tell Ian—whether he should ever know what she was really planning.

My silent fretting was interrupted when Jared suddenly stopped. I hadn't been paying attention, letting him tow me along beside him. Now I realized we were already at our destination.

I hesitated. As much as I knew this had to be done, I was honestly a little frightened of what Ian's reaction might be. _Suck it up,_ I thought to myself. My hand tentatively reached towards the door, but Jared beat me to it, moving it aside silently. I took a deep breath and stepped away from Jared. He made as if to follow me, but I turned on him and shook my head.

"What is it?" he whispered.

"You're not coming in with me," I said in a low voice. Jared looked as if he were about to protest; I placed a hand on his chest. "Stay here. I have to do this myself." He frowned at me unhappily.

"Stay," I repeated. I took a deep breath and turned away from him.

I stepped carefully into Ian's room and Jared replaced the door behind me. The room was dark; the light from the cryotank cast a dim red glow, revealing a form on the mattress at my feet. Ian was sprawled on his back, his breathing deep and even. I watched his unconscious face, illuminated in red. His expression was relaxed and peaceful. Blissfully unaware. I cringed, knowing I was about to shatter that peace. Trying to keep myself from panicking, I shifted the cryotank to one arm and knelt down next to him.

"Ian," I whispered. I hesitated, then carefully placed my hand on his shoulder. "Ian, wake up."

He groaned and rolled to one side. "Wanda?" he murmured sleepily. I bit my lip, uncertain of what to do.

"Ian, please wake up." I shook his shoulder slightly, and he seemed to hear me.

His eyes opened halfway, searching the room with a confused expression. They finally focused on the light of the cryotank cradled in one of my arms. He blinked several times, trying to orient himself.

"Wanda, what..." he stopped short, suddenly focused. He took in the occupied cryotank, and then slowly looked up, his eyes locking on mine. I quickly realized what he must be missing—the silvery reflection of light around my irises. Even in the faint glowing light, my eyes would have revealed any soul inside of me. I forced myself to not spring up and run, instead my muscles locked in place as I braced for the worst.

For one long moment, time seemed to stand absolutely still. A million expressions flitted across his face; I could see the pain most clearly, overshadowing each one of them. Somehow I was able to hear him over the blood pounding in my ears.

"NO!"

It barely sounded like a word. It was an agonized cry of denial, echoing violently in the small space. Ian sprang up; his movement knocked me backwards into the wall. Instinctively both my arms wrapped around Wanda's cryotank as my back made painful contact with the rock. I froze for a moment, trying to find the breath that had been knocked out of me. My lungs finally gained control, and I gasped for air.

Ian was still as a statue only a few feet away from me. He moved suddenly, and before I had registered what happened, he was right in front of me. I couldn't see anything except for his face, contorted with rage. A genuine thrill of fear made me cringe away from him, but there was nowhere to go—I was pressed against the rough uneven wall.

"Why?" he shouted. It was almost a growl.

My shock was wearing off, and I began to feel the soreness in my back. I sucked in a sharp breath as the pain registered.

"Please, Ian, let me explain," I gasped. I forced my arms to move and pushed Wanda's tank towards him; his hands automatically rose to take it from me. He looked down at the tank, the red light illuminating his face.

"See?" I said. His expression began to soften as he realized what he was holding. "She's safe. She's not going anywhere."

He looked up at me. I cringed as I saw the pain still overshadowing his expression. I took a deep breath, and let everything spill out of my mouth at top speed.

"You _had_ to see this was coming. I mean I know I shared a mind with her and all, but you should have guessed what she would do. She's so selfless, she would have never stopped until she freed me from her. Please, _please,_ don't hate me—I love her too and I didn't want her to do this, she can help us all better than I ever could, and I'm _not_ just going to let her go. Jared and I figure we can find her a new body—one that's been completely taken over by a soul so there's no human inside because I know she doesn't want to imprison someone again..." I stopped to catch my breath.

Ian stared at me for a moment. His expression was slightly calmer; he stepped back to give me some space. I moved away from the wall, trying to suppress the groan of pain that this caused.

"I'm sorry... Melanie" he said, seeming upset. His arms tightened around Wanda's cryotank.

"S'okay," I muttered, sinking to the floor.

He hesitated, then came and sat near me. It was quiet for a moment.

"I guess I underestimated her," he said with a hollow laugh. "But you're right. She isn't going anywhere. I won't let that happen." He held her tank closer to his chest. I relaxed a little; he didn't seem angry anymore. Just resigned.

He sighed. "So what happens now?"

I forced myself not to laugh; that was exactly what I had asked.

"Well... we can try to find her a new body," I began, remembering my earlier conversation with Jared. "From what I know, not all humans stay with their hosts. If we brought another soul back and took them out of the body, there's a chance the human might not wake up... that they're just gone forever..." I shuddered, realizing that we wanted this to be the case so that we could get Wanda back. I tried to steer my mind on to something else. "So, that's the plan. If you're okay with it... it's really your decision more than anyone else's."

I glanced up at him. He sighed. "I guess it is my decision... yes, I'd like you to try that."

"Do you want to come with us on the raid?"

He shook his head. "No, I'm staying here with Wanda."

"Okay." I could understand that. "I'm not sure when we're going to leave... I want to stay a little while to see what happens with Jodi..." I trailed off. Ian looked up.

"She hasn't woken up yet?" he asked sharply.

I shook my head. I could see the expression on his face; it must have looked a lot like mine. Hope and despair at the same time. Hope for Wanda—that some humans won't wake up, so that we can put her in someone without her being a parasite. Despair for the humans like Jodi who might have lost themselves, who might have been completely erased forever. I didn't know what to say; the silence lengthened.

Ian moved- he shifted carefully onto his knees and then he was on his feet. He was careful not to jostle the tank he held. I took this as my opportunity to leave. I rose and shifted the door aside.

As I stepped out, I turned to put the door back. Ian was watching me, a strange expression on his face. I couldn't decipher it. When he saw me looking back he turned away. I sighed; the worst, the part I had been dreading the most, was over. Ian really was one of the more reasonable people here, I had to admit.

Jared was waiting for me not far from Ian's room. He had been sitting with his back against the rough rock; as soon as he saw me he sprang onto his feet and half-ran to me. I wordlessly reached for him, and his arms went around me. I knew I would never take his touch for granted. It erased all the pain and anxiety I felt- I sighed and relaxed as I felt the warmth between us. I knew that I could handle anything with him at my side.

* * *

AN: This chapter has been revised for style and grammar.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

The rest of the first morning passed in a blur.

Jamie—sweet, trusting Jamie—was ecstatic, of course, and when I held him in my arms on my own free will, I didn't want to let go. He didn't suspect for one moment what Wanda's true plans had been; of course we were going to get her a new body; of course she was staying here with us. His utter innocence brought tears to my eyes. Luckily, there was already moisture trickling down my cheeks because of our reunion. He pleaded to go on the raid with me and Jared, his eyes shining eagerly, and I couldn't find it in myself to say no. I would do anything for him.

We walked to breakfast together: me, Jared, and Jamie, side-by-side. Jared's arm was wrapped around my waist; Jamie was on my other side, holding my hand. He kept bouncing around energetically, only my firm grip on his hand kept him beside me. As we neared the kitchen, Jamie let go of my hand and bounded forward, excitedly announcing my new freedom to everyone who was there.

I vividly remembered the silence which had often greeted Wanda when she was new in the caves, and I was expecting something similar, so I was surprised when an excited babble broke out as I rounded the corner. Everyone was curious. I answered a lot of questions and received many welcomes. Sharon and Maggie surprised me the most—I had been so accustomed to their hostility towards Wanda, and it truly threw me when they both greeted me with warm (if slightly hesitant) hugs.

Some of them—those who had been Wanda's friends—asked about her. I hesitated, but told them about our plans to go on a raid to find a body for her. I decided to leave it at that; I didn't really know what Wanda would have wanted me to say, and I would let her do any explaining after she was put into a new body. Did she want anyone to know that she'd intended to erase herself for good? It wasn't my place to tell anyone, and I carefully avoided all paths which led to that subject as I was pelted with questions.

Only Jeb seemed to see through my tactics. He had welcomed me back with as much enthusiasm as he ever had, but as I directed my answers away from the subject of Wanda's decision, he watched me thoughtfully. I wouldn't have put it past him to guess what Wanda had been up to.

Jared could see my slight discomfort as well, and after a while, he shooed everyone away and steered me to one of the counters. My stomach snarled when I smelled the food, and I immediately began shoveling down the eggs he brought me. This was another reason I knew Wanda had to stay with us—the food really had improved a lot since she had started going on raids, not that I'd paid a whole lot of attention to those sorts of things when I was just a presence in her mind. However, the notion of living on coarse bread and weak soup wasn't appetizing to me.

Jamie stayed at my side, chattering excitedly. He seemed completely oblivious to everything else, and followed me and Jared out of the kitchen. When we reached the main plaza, Jared paused looked at me questioningly. I knew that I wasn't expected to work today, and no force on Earth was strong enough to keep Jared from coming with me everywhere I went. I glanced at Jamie—he was still bouncing around happily—and then I looked back at Jared and inclined my head towards the south tunnel, the one which led to the hospital. Jared nodded and then turned to Jamie.

"Get to school, kid."

Jamie stopped his bouncing. "Aw, c'mon Jared, I can skip a day," he pleaded. He looked at me with round eyes, practically begging. It was hard to deny him anything when he did this, but this was one thing I didn't want him to see yet.

I tried to smile. "Don't worry Jamie, I'm not going to disappear anywhere," I reassured him, patting his tangled hair. He pouted, but turned and went down another tunnel, shoulders hunched.

I sighed and began walking towards the south tunnel. Jared stayed at my side, his arm still around my waist.

I tried to clear my mind of distractions and focus as we headed silently down the tunnel. There were plenty of distractions. My mind continually strayed to the feeling of Jared's hand resting lightly on my hip. There was a small area on my waist where my shirt had ridden up slightly, and his warm calloused fingers would gently brush the sensitive bare skin. Yes, this was very distracting. I tried, with limited success, to push it from my mind.

I needed a game plan. We were going back to the hospital to check on Jodi. Would she wake up? How long would we wait before we gave up on her? I was sure that Doc, or maybe even the Healer's human host, would be able to answer that question better than I could.

I could tell Jared was thinking hard, too. Probably about the raid. No doubt he was already planning when to leave and where to go. We would have to go somewhere far away from here, probably a larger city where we wouldn't be noticed.

We continued on in silence, both of us wrapped up in our own thoughts. Finally, I could see a light ahead of us. I didn't hear any voices as we approached the hospital, but I knew they were there. The first thing I noticed when we stepped into the bright room was Kyle.

I had seen many expressions on Kyle's face—most of them angry, and very recently, I had seen his softer side with the alien Sunny. But I had never seen him like this. His face wasn't hard. It was desperate. I swallowed against the lump forming in my throat as I processed his expression. I'd never had much sympathy for Kyle, especially after he tried to kill us, but I couldn't help feeling bad for him now. He was sitting on the cot next to Jodi's body; his eyes didn't stray from her.

There were other people in the hospital. I saw Doc with Trudy and the Healer's host. They looked up as we entered, the new woman's eyes widening in fear. I sighed, and loosened Jared's arm from my waist so that I could walk forward and get more introductions out of the way.

* * *

We stayed in the hospital for a long time. The Healer's host had remembered her name; it was Candy. She had been talking with Doc about healing. Doc was a good audience; Candy seemed eager to share her experiences with someone after her long imprisonment, and once she felt fairly comfortable, she began speaking animatedly. Doc was clearly pleased with how much she remembered from Summer Song's life as a Healer; her knowledge of healing would be extremely useful to him.

Kyle didn't say much. He continued to watch Jodi, ignoring most everyone else. I caught him looking at me and Jared once—it was easy to see why. The soul had been removed from my body, and I was awake. Jared had me back. Kyle wanted his Jodi back. He wanted to stand next to her like Jared was next to me, delighted to have his love back with him.

I was glad when my grumbling stomach gave me an excuse to leave. Trudy came with me and Jared to the kitchen; she stacked several sandwiches onto a tray and headed back to the hospital with them. We didn't follow her back; instead, we grabbed some sandwiches and water and began walking in the direction of our room, eating as we walked. I was beginning to feel the effects of my sleepless night; it was hard to concentrate on anything.

I paused as we passed Ian's room. I hadn't seen him in the kitchens; had he stayed in there all morning? I ignored Jared's disapproving look and moved the door aside. Ian was sitting on his mattress, leaning against the wall with Wanda's cryotank cradled in his lap. He didn't look like he had moved. I didn't bother trying to talk to him, I just set half my sandwich and a bottle of water next to him.

"Thanks," he muttered as I turned to leave.

"Anytime," I whispered before slipping through the door.

Jared was waiting for me; he took my hand and led me to our room. I was really feeling tired now; my eyelids drooped without my permission and my head felt detatched—disconnected from my surroundings. I yawned and blinked, trying to keep myself from losing my balance as my head swirled.

I stumbled into our room. Jared put his arm around my waist and tugged me down onto the soft mattress. I was mostly asleep when he turned me to face him and pulled me against his chest. My last conscious act was to nestle my face into the curve of his warm neck. Then I was gone.

* * *

AN: This chapter has been edited for style and grammar.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

When I awoke, it was pitch black. I was still cradled in Jared's arms. I could hear his even breaths, but I knew he was awake. His hands were absently rubbing my back. I shifted slightly and turned my head to look up at the ceiling; there were a few stars shining through the maze of cracks.

It must have been the middle of the night, but I was no longer tired. I was far too aware of the heat of Jared's body against mine—not just his warmth, but the steadily burning fire which smoldered between us. I could tell that he knew I was awake now; he bent his head to nuzzle my face and one of his hands gently eased under my shirt to rub the sensitive skin at the base of my spine.

The fire between us burned hotter, gaining strength. His touch was making me crazy; I instantly craved more of him. I clutched him tighter, but then he groaned and pulled away from me. I was confused and disappointed until I felt him sit up and heard the sound of fabric moving against skin. Then I heard his shirt hit the floor with a very soft thud, and he was back.

His burning lips searched for mine and I felt both his arms wrap around me, pulling me against him. The fire was now out of control—it coursed through my veins and seared wherever our skin met. It almost hurt, but I wanted more; I wanted every inch of my body to be burned. I pulled myself impossibly closer to him.

I couldn't think anymore; sensation dominated everything. The fire between us raged on in the peace of the starlit night.

* * *

My eyes opened when the sky began to lighten. It must have been just before sunrise; the predawn light illuminated the room by the tiniest degree—instead of it being pitch black, I could make out vague shapes of things.

I was very warm, still curled up with Jared, my back against his chest. Our contentment was almost tangible; we were both satisfied but unwilling to let go of one another. His arms held me to him loosely, his face buried in my tangled hair. I had lost track of time hours ago; I never wanted this moment to end.

The sun was definitely rising now. Beams of light shot through the maze of cracks and made strange patterns on the rough walls of the room. The darkness had felt safe, but now that the light was creeping into our room, I felt a little exposed. Jamie had, thankfully, slept somewhere else during the night, but I was suddenly worried that he, or someone else, might be looking for us soon.

I sighed and wriggled free of Jared's arms so that I could stretch. I felt a little sore, but it wasn't unpleasant. My eyes roved around the room, looking for my clothes. I spotted my shirt in the corner and quickly rolled to my feet to retrieve it. I heard some shifting behind me as I crept to the corner. Jared was awake; he had propped himself up on one elbow and was watching me, grinning. I blushed and snatched my shirt up, quickly pulling it over my head. I found my shorts and pulled them on as fast as I could.

This amused Jared for some reason. He chuckled as he leaned over to grab the pair of jeans that had ended up next to the mattress. I rolled my eyes at him as I began combing through my messy hair with quick fingers.

Breakfast was thankfully devoid of the curious stares and persistent questions which I had endured the day before, however, it was far from boring.

The first thing I noticed when we walked into the mostly empty kitchen was that Ian was there. He was holding Wanda's cryotank to his side with one arm, his eyes scanning his surroundings as if he were prepared to defend her to the death. Which probably wasn't far from the truth. Beside him, Jamie was chattering away, seeming completely oblivious to Ian's tension as Jared and I got our food.

I hesitated, then walked to Jamie and leaned against the counter next to him. Jared sat on the counter on my other side. Jamie immediately turned and began chattering excitedly at me without stopping, filling me in on anything I might have missed.

He had slept in Kyle's usual bed last night, speed-talking through his explanation. "...Because Kyle's still sleeping in the hospital with Doc so Ian was by himself—I bet Wanda would want someone to keep Ian company and there's plenty of room even when Kyle's there; I was thinking maybe I'll just stay there for now because our room's sorta small for all three of us and I dunno when Kyle's gonna be back..." he kept talking, his cheeks turning a faint pink under the dark tan.

Jared chuckled quietly; his warm arm snaked around me.

"Yes, that's a good idea. You should definitely keep Ian company," he remarked, meeting my glower with an innocent expression. At least that was settled.

* * *

As we walked towards the hospital to check on Jodi again, there was a certain businesslike atmosphere that I detected. Ian and Jamie were with us. We had begun to discuss the raid. Jamie was enthusiastic about coming with us; he supplied most of the conversation, wondering aloud what kind of body we should be looking for.

"A girl, obviously," Jared said absentmindedly. I could tell he was already half-forming plans on how to go about finding someone suitable. "A younger girl, probably."

"But not too young," I said quickly, glancing at Ian. I had a feeling Wanda wouldn't be very happy with me if she had to go through years of frustration with such an honorable man. Better to find a body that was at least in its teens.

"Aren't younger hosts supposed to be a bit more...pliable?" Jared questioned, looking down at me. "There's less of a chance that the human will still be present, right?"

"Yes, but my point is that I don't think Wanda would want the be put into the body of a five-year-old girl," I said, rolling my eyes.

"We should find someone really pretty, too. What do you think, Ian?" Jamie piped up. Jared and I both turned our heads to watch his reaction.

He didn't look up; his eyes never left Wanda's cryotank.

"I don't care what she looks like," he said, still staring down at the red glowing light.

Doc, Kyle, and Candy were all in the hospital when we got there. Candy didn't even jump when we entered—she seemed to have grown accustomed to the caves already. She and Doc were talking quietly; I quickly picked up that they were discussing Jodi.

She still had not gained consciousness, and we couldn't keep her like this forever. Her muscles would weaken, and her body was not getting the nutrition it needed.

Kyle seemed subdued. The desperation I had seen in him earlier had turned to sad resignation. I watched him out of the corner of my eye as Ian moved to stand next to him, clapping him on the shoulder and looking down at the little body. I realized Ian had known Jodi, too. Her unresponsiveness hurt him as well. How much longer would we wait for Jodi before we decided she wasn't coming back?

* * *

The answer was a week.

We waited and waited, but it was clear to me that Jodi wasn't coming back. I was quick to accept this fact, but I didn't share my thoughts on the subject with anyone. It seemed cruel to step on the small shard of hope that the others retained.

Kyle asked to have the soul named Sunny reinserted into Jodi's body. I was curious about how exactly it was to be done; we all were. This was not something I'd seen before.

Candy directed the insertion. She showed us how to use the dial on the cryotank to begin the thaw sequence; we all watched with wonder as she carefully dipped her hand into the thawed tank with practiced skill, retrieving the beautiful shimmering body of the soul. While she was doing this, Doc made a careful incision along the faint pink scar on Jodi's neck.

As Candy gently guided the soul into the body, she explained how insertions were done in a Healing facility—how there was an alien medication that stopped the flow of blood, how they scanned the body to ensure all of the attachments were correctly bound to the human's nervous system.

We didn't have to wait long for Sunny to come around.

As she began to stir, Kyle took her hand and leaned over her.

"Sunny? Can you hear me?" he said in a gentle voice which still sounded strange to my ears.

Her eyes fluttered open, darting around as they adjusted to the light. She tried to sit up, but he put a hand on her shoulder.

"Kyle?" she whispered, finally focusing on his face. She seemed confused. "I...what happened?"

Kyle smiled slightly. He pressed his hand to her face as she stared up at him with wide, hopeful eyes.

"I guess you get to stay after all."

* * *

AN: This chapter has been revised for style and grammar.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Everything was ready.

Jared, Jamie, and I were set for the raid. We were going to take the same car that Jared and Wanda has used to steal medication for Jamie. We planned to drive far north–we would start looking in Oregon and continue into Washington if we didn't find anyone.

On the way we would hit up a few Healing facilities. Jared and I had talked to Candy, who had been very helpful. She named off a number of different medications that would be useful to steal.

The night we left, the moon was nearly full. Its brilliant silver glow lit up the desert as we walked with a quick pace to where the jeep was hidden. It was my first time being outside since Wanda's extraction from my body. The beauty of the moonlit desert was surreal, however, the brightness of the moon bleached the ground to a bony white, making it almost feel like daylight, and I couldn't help but feel horribly exposed. I think Jamie knew what I was feeling; he squeezed my hand.

The ride in the jeep was short—we quickly reached the humble sedan. Before I knew it, we were cruising below the speed limit on the highway. I sat in the front while Jared drove, one hand on the steering wheel and the other entwined with mine between the front seats. Jamie was stretched out in the backseat, his head lolling forward onto his chest, his breaths deep and even.

We were in the suburbs just outside Los Angeles when the sun began to climb in the sky. Jared exited the freeway and pulled into an empty gas station—the unremarkable sedan got great mileage, but the tank had finally begun to run low. He leaned across me to dig three pairs of sunglasses out of the glove compartment.

"Let me get the gas," I said in a sure voice. Before he could protest, I had snatched a pair of sunglasses and put them on, getting out of the car. A wave of warmth hit me as I stepped onto the concrete.

"Melanie..." Jared started.

"I'll be fine, Jared," I said before I closed the door quietly behind me.

I had filled a car with gas maybe two or three times in my life before the invasion, but the cheerful instructions at the pump were easy enough to follow. Jared or Jamie could have done this easily, but it was better if I did it. I knew the souls better than they did; I had heard Wanda talk to other souls countless times. I knew what they expected. I could act like one of them more naturally than Jared. I could improvise a name for myself and even talk about other planets I had seen in Wanda's memories if I had to.

Luckily, no attendants came out of the little gas station mart to help me or make conversation. Jared got out to rummage in the trunk just as the pump automatically stopped filling the tank—he quickly slid back into his seat with a box of granola bars and some water. I put the pump back in its holder and got in the car, trying not to move too quickly in case someone was watching.

A half hour later, we were in the heart of the city as we transitioned from the I-10 to the I-5. There was more traffic here; my skin prickled as we slowed down. Souls in other cars would glance at our car. Some would smile at us. I tried to smile back. Jared stared straight ahead, focused.

We were soon thankfully out of the maze of freeways that crisscrossed the city. The suburbs were replaced with familiar dry brownish foothills which the freeway snaked through. I remembered when I lived in Los Angeles long ago, before the invasion. Things didn't seem all that different now, I thought, as I stared out the window at the dry grass and low bushes that surrounded us.

The hills eventually disappeared behind us—we were now passing green fields and orchards. I dozed a bit as my body released some of its tension. The monotony of the flat expanse of land soothed my nerves.

Jared stopped in a small college town outside Sacramento. It was a little out of the way, but there were several Healing facilities to hit up, and the town was practically empty because it was still summer. He got the gas this time; as he opened the door I was hit with a wave of sweltering heat. Yes, it was definitely summer. I stayed in the car and stretched in the limited space, shaking the sleep from my limbs. Jamie was quiet in the backseat—he was usually more exuberant, but he seemed to emulate Jared when it came to raids. Right now, he was alert and tense. I watched as the sun began to sink behind the horizon, contemplating our next task.

The light was beginning to fade as we pulled into the parking lot of the first Healing facility. Jared drove around the back of the building. I quickly spotted some small unguarded crates, all labeled. I slipped out of the car and walked casually over to them. I grabbed ones whose names I recognized and hurried back to the car. The trunk popped open, I placed them inside as quickly as possible, and then we were driving away to another Healing facility.

We repeated the process. This time, I made Jared get in the passenger seat as I was loading more crates into the trunk. He had been driving all day; he needed to rest. He kept his eyes open until I got back on the highway, then he relaxed and fell asleep.

I let my mind drift as I drove us farther north. We had passed many places I recognized—my mind wandered to memories of my life before the invasion. I couldn't help but marvel at what we were doing now. I would never have guessed that I would ever be in such a situation. Alien takeovers, finding a secret group of human survivors, being friends with the alien put in me, going on a dangerous raid to get her a body...it was all so surreal. I half-expected to wake up and have it all be an elaborate dream.

Headlights from a car going the opposite direction washed over us; I focused. No, this wasn't a dream, I thought, as I stared through the windshield at the moon-bleached expanse of highway. I'm not going to wake up; I'm here. Life will go on, even if it's not how anyone expected it to unfold. Certainly nobody had expected this.

Irrational tears sprung to my eyes. I didn't want to have to worry about being caught by aliens. I didn't want to always be reminded of the danger as I felt the almost nonexistent weight of the cyanide pill that Jared had given me before we left. I wanted to live without fear, without this constant threat which made my chest feel heavy. I wanted everything to be as happy and perfects as it was before the invasion.

I blinked—the tears in my eyes spilled onto my cheeks, glittering in the moonlight.

* * *

I was able to get a hold of myself before Jared or Jamie stirred. I didn't know what had come over me, but I felt better.

The rising sun filtered golden through the mist and dense trees as we wound through roads somewhere in the southern part of Oregon. We stopped for gas again—Jared got more granola bars out of the trunk for us, and I gratefully switched back to the passenger seat to get some sleep. Jamie was more animated today, going on about what he thought Wanda should look like. The green forest and low clouds typical of the Pacific Northwest seemed to envelop and protect us from exposure, and I drifted to sleep to the sound of Jamie's chattering.

When I awoke, we were outside of Portland and had a job to do. The plan was to stick mostly to the suburbs. We would drive slowly through the streets, looking for someone suitable. If we found a good body, I would follow her on foot and lead her to Jared, who would be waiting with a can of medication we had stolen that caused a person to sleep.

I tried to shake off the guilt I felt as our eyes roved the streets for a potential Wanda. These souls were very gentle, and whomever we took would be missed by friends and family.

We weren't having much luck on the streets, so I had Jared pull over next to a park. I had seen a handful of girls about the right age as we drove through residential areas, but I couldn't picture any of them with Wanda inside, their mouths forming her words. We let the car idle as our eyes scanned the park, talking quietly.

"I'd say she should be in her teens, maybe just a little older than Jamie," I said. I glanced at him, he nodded enthusiastically.

"I think she should look...innocent," Jared said slowly as we watched a group of girls around my age talking near our car. "We'll still need her for raids, and I think it would help for her to look so sweet that nobody would suspect her of anything."

We contemplated this, now looking for someone who matched Jared's description, but it was starting to get dark, and the souls were going home. None of the girls seemed right, and none of them were alone. Eventually, there was nobody left outside, so we moved on. Jared drove us back onto the highway heading north towards Seattle.

* * *

AN: This chapter has been edited for style and grammar.


	7. Chapter 7

**Much thanks to all of you who have been reviewing this story- I clap and squeal like a little kid every time a review alert shows up in my inbox.**

**This chapter ended up being a little short, I tried to make it longer but it didn't really work out. I might add in a few sentences here and there if I get any ideas later on.**

Disclaimer: I don't own the Host. Though I_ do _own a grapefruit-sized pikachu doll, so I guess it evens out.

Chapter 7

It was the middle of the afternoon when we reached Seattle. There were a few clouds scattered across the sky and it was pleasantly warm. There were lots of souls outside, enjoying the weather. We found another park and let the car sit under the shade of a tree.

I was hopeful that we would find the right body here- there were lots of girls about the right age talking and laughing in the sun. There was a pretty girl with very short, straight coppery hair talking with a taller girl with brown hair that fell to her waist. Either one would do, but they just didn't look quite like what we wanted. We kept watching, occasionally pointing someone out.

"What about her?" I asked, pointing towards a dark-skinned girl with raven-black hair.

"She looks a little older- like she could be your age," Jared pointed out as we watched her wave to someone. "Oh, ugh... see? She has a boyfriend. I don't think we should..."

"Yes, of course you're right," I said quickly, as we watched her embrace a young man who appeared to be her partner.

More time passed. There had been a few more girls we considered, but they still weren't exactly right. This was one decision I was okay with not rushing.

The sun was just beginning to lower in the sky when Jamie suddenly broke the silence.

"There, look!"

He was pointing towards a swing set not far from us. There were two girls on the swings, but I immediately knew which one he was pointing to.

She was beautiful; angelic. Her body was tiny, but something about the way she was shaped made me think that she was at least in her teens. Her complexion was bright, and her long golden hair swished around her as she swung forwards and backwards on the swing... and her beautiful face was so sweet that I automatically wanted to comfort if she was ever frightened and help her in any way that I could.

I heard Jared exhale- a sigh. I knew what he was thinking. She was perfect.

Jared voiced what I was thinking. "Look at her face, could you ever distrust her? It's like everyone would just naturally want to protect her."

"What do you think, Jamie?" I asked.

"Yes!" he said excitedly. "She's definitely the one."

We began to plan exactly what to do as we kept our eyes on her- she was still laughing on the swings with her friend. Once she was on her own, I would approach her and ask for directions. I could lead her near our car and then Jared could handle the rest. She would never suspect a thing, all we had to do was make sure nobody saw us.

A few minutes later she and her friend left the park. It looked like they were walking home- we followed them from a distance. They separated a few short blocks away from the park, going into houses across the street from one another... they must have been neighbors, then. We stayed in the car, which we had parked in front of a house on the corner of her street. I was suddenly worried- what if she didn't leave the house again? Would we break in and grab her in the dead of night? At least we knew where she lived, now. We could come back if we had to.

"Let's drive around a little," I whispered to Jared. "We should probably get a little familiar with the area."

Jared nodded and put the car in drive. We drove slowly down the block, taking in our surroundings. I made a mental note of a narrow alley that appeared to lead to another street. I directed Jared to turn right at the end of the block, and then turn onto the next street. I noted the street name.

"Wait, stop here for a sec," I said. I quickly slipped out of the car and jogged over to the gap in between two houses. Yes, it was the same alley. A plan was already half-formed in my mind as I peered down the narrow space. I hurried back to the car.

"That alley leads back to her street," I explained to Jared and Jamie as soon as I closed the car door. "We can keep the car here and go down there to see if she comes out again."

"Okay," Jared said. He maneuvered the car so that it was parked right next to the alley, then we all got out. I fished around in the trunk until I found the right crate- I opened it and retrieved a little spray bottle.

"She'll have to inhale this, just spray some in front of her face," I told Jared as I handed him the little bottle. He nodded and slipped it into his pocket.

We didn't have to wait long. The sun was beginning to disappear when we spotted her leaving her house, walking with her back to us. Alone.

This was it. I turned to Jared and Jamie.

"Just try to act naturally. I'll lead her over here and introduce you and then... yeah. Be quick and try not to scare her. She looks so... fragile."

They nodded, and I turned away from them and began heading towards her. I walked quickly, soon I had caught up to her. The rosy orange sunset was reflecting on her hair, making it a strange pinkish color. I took a deep breath.

"Excuse me?" I called out to her. She stopped and turned around. She was even prettier close up- her eyes were a soft gray and there was a light scattering of freckles across her little round cheeks.

"Hi," she said, looking surprised. But not suspicious. Her voice was high and sweet.

"Hello. My name is Melanie." I smiled at her as a soul would. I used my own name; I didn't want to lie to her more than I had to. "I'm new in town and... I think I'm lost."

"Oh!" she said quickly. "Where are you trying to go? I'll take you." She leaned to one side slightly to look back at her house. "Our car is just back-"

"No, it's not far," I interrupted her. "I was going for a walk, but now I can't find my way back to Becker Street," I said, remember the name of the street where we had parked the car. I smiled sheepishly, as if embarrassed that I had gotten lost.

She smiled back.

"You're very close. It's just around the second corner up that way," she said, gesturing to the end of the street behind me, "but you can cut right through this little alley here. It takes you straight there."

Perfect. This was almost too easy.

"Could you show me?" I asked innocently. "I'm sorry, what's your name?"

"Of course! Come with me." She seemed delighted to help me. "I'm Petals Open to the Moon, but my family mostly calls me Pet. Where are you from, Melanie?"

I laughed nervously- we were nearing the alley. "Do you mean San Diego or the Singing World, Pet?" I asked, trying to keep my tone light.

"Either one." She laughed with me. "There are two Bats on this street. They live in that yellow house with the pine trees," she informed me, gesturing behind us.

We were at the alley now.

"I'll have to say hello," I said quietly, not able to keep all of the tension out of my voice. I searched the dark alley for Jared and Jamie- I could see them waiting in the shadows. When they saw me they both took a step forward. Pet looked at me curiously, then into the alley. Still not suspicious.

"These are my friends, Pet," I said, gesturing towards them. My heart beat faster as she stepped towards them.

"Oh!" she said, surprised. "Oh, hello." She raised her hand to shake Jared's- this was it.

He grasped her hand tightly and suddenly pulled her up to him. In that split second before she inhaled the silvery mist, her sweet little face looked frightened.

"Wha-" she began, but she was unconscious before she could finish the word.

Jared caught her as she sagged towards the ground, lifting her little body easily and holding her gently against his chest. He glanced around to make sure nobody had seen, and then we were hurrying down the alley to the car. He carefully placed Pet in the backseat next to Jamie, who was given the little bottle of medication.

"Keep an eye on her," I murmured. "In case she starts to wake up."

I got in the driver's seat- it was Jared's turn to sleep. We were soon back on the highway heading south towards home.

**************

**A/Ns**

**-This chapter was slightly tedious to write (though not quite as tedious as chapters 8 and 9, you'll see why soon enough), just because I had to go back to the book a lot to make sure that everything was how it's supposed to be- Jamie did tell Wanda a little bit about how they picked out her new body, and I kept having to go back and alter things so that everything was canon. **

**-This was also my first time having to take a specific situation that you see in The Host and making it from another person's perspective. (I'll always remember when I read the part of Midnight Sun that's posted on Stephenie Meyer's website, and being really fascinated by how Edward notices different things, and how he sometimes misinterprets what Bella's thinking, etc. It's like reading Twilight in stereo instead of mono, if that makes sense. So I tried to emulate that in this chapter when it came time to have Melanie approach Pet). Let me know what you think.**

**-As always, please review! **


	8. Chapter 8

**Second to last chapter =( I'm a bit sad that it's coming to an end, honestly... to everyone who has reviewed my story: THANK YOU. It means a lot that you've taken the time to read it and tell me what you think. **

**Side note: A few weeks ago I wrote a one-shot for The Host called "The Truth" and I posted it yesterday, if you have an extra minute please read it and give some feedback! **

Disclaimer: I don't own the Host. Though I _do_ own a rather large pirate flag, so I can't complain.

Chapter 8

We didn't stop on the way back to Arizona except to get gas a few times. Now that our mission was complete, I wanted to be back in the safety of the caves.

Pet stirred occasionally. Each time she did this, Jamie would quickly lean over her and spray the silvery mist in front of her face. Driving both day and night, it took us two days to get back to the caves. The sky was darkening as Jared took the car off the highway and attached the tarps to the back bumper. We eventually made it to the jeep and managed to fit the small crates of medication behind the seats. A short ride later we were home.

They were waiting for us. Ian was the first one I saw, but Jeb and Doc were there behind him as well. The two of them loaded up with the medication we had raided. Ian didn't move- he watched Jared lift Pet carefully out of the jeep with an expression which I couldn't quite read, but it seemed to soften when he saw Pet's tiny, sweet face. He was still holding Wanda's tank to his chest.

Pet's extraction took place without any incidents. Candy and Doc were a good team; soon Pet was safe in her tank. Then the waiting began. I was fairly sure that there was nobody there to claim Pet's body, but we all wanted to be sure, for Wanda's sake. So we waited.

This was fine by me- I had learned to be patient with things. Things like having alone time with Jared, for example.

The raid had been a lot like the time after I first met Jared, when Jamie was always with us when me and Jared stayed up late talking to each other. I was happy to be with both of them, but the raid had gone on long enough. I needed to be with Jared. Alone.

The night we got back from the raid, Jared and I eventually found our way back to our room after eating and getting cleaned up. He took the clothes we had just washed and hung them next to the bed to dry. He turned around slowly, looking at me questioningly. I stepped towards him and he opened his arms for me; I leaped into them. Laughing at my energy, he kissed me and gently pulled me down with him onto the mattress.

***

I spent a lot of time in the hospital while we waited to see if Pet's host ever woke up, and therefore so did Jared. Ian was there with us a lot, too. I could tell that he liked the body, even though he never actually said so. His eyes would linger on her face, and he would unconsciously tighten his grip on Wanda's tank. Jamie was with us sometimes as well, and he managed to get us talking and even laughing a little. Soon enough everything would fall into place as it should, and the knowledge of this caused a discernible lift in the caves.

I didn't expect the people in the caves to miss Wanda very much, so I was surprised and touched at the level of concern that everyone had for her in her absence. The hospital had many more visitors than usual these days. Wanda's friends came to see Pet's body- some of them stayed for a while to talk, only leaving when Jeb occasionally stalked into the room threatening to shoot any slackers who were neglecting their chores.

Even Kyle came every now and then. He was always with Sunny- she appeared to be permanently attached to him, and he didn't seem to mind her presence. He mostly talked with Ian and Jared, one arm always around Sunny. She stared curiously at me now and then, and I wondered what she saw when she looked at me. Perhaps something she thought Kyle was hoping for in her... I could only guess.

***

On the fifth day, we decided that we had waited long enough.

Word quickly got out that we were going to perform the insertion, and soon at least fifteen people had convened in the hospital to watch. I grasped Jared's hand in mine and edged through the small crowd to get as close as I could. Jamie followed us, bouncing with his usual excited energy. I ended up behind Doc, Candy, and Jeb.

Ian was on the other side of the cot; I could clearly see his focused expression in the light of the blue lanterns which hung overhead.

Candy opened Pet's mouth and placed the little square of No Pain on her tongue, washing it down with a little water. The older Healer easily rolled Pet's body so that she was on her stomach. She carefully gathered up the waves of golden hair and held them away from Pet's neck. Then she shifted aside to give Doc room.

Doc held the scalpel firmly in his hand. He looked up at Ian and nodded.

"Turn the dial like I did last time," Candy instructed.

Ian carefully shifted the tank to one arm so that he could reach the dial. The light on the tank began to pulse. As he did this, Doc slid the scalpel into the pink scar at the base of Pet's tiny neck. Blood began trickling down her skin- he quickly sprayed on some of the new medication we had brought back, and the flow of blood stopped.

Everyone's eyes were now on Ian. He took a deep breath, then popped the lid of Wanda's tank. His hand was steady- he dipped it into the tank and slowly pulled her little body out. I heard his breath catch as he stared down at the bright little silver ribbon cupped in his palm.

She was surreally beautiful, her feathery body undulating in smooth, wavelike movements. Ian's eyes were wide and soft- he held her in his palm for a moment, absorbing her beauty. Then, he slowly lowered his hand to the incision and tipped her into the body. We all leaned in to watch her gracefully slide into the opening; soon she had almost completely disappeared as she attached herself to her new body, there was just a faint visible glimmer of silver now.

Doc quickly cleaned and healed the incision, smearing the Seal over the wound and sprinkling on some of the scar-softening dust. Then he wiped the back of her neck with a damp cloth to clean the blood off.

That was all- it had been done.

A weight that I hadn't even been aware of fell off my chest as I watched Ian lift her gently to lay her on her back. He brushed some strands of golden hair out of her face, then settled next to her, taking her fragile-looking hands in one of his.

"How long?" he asked quietly, his eyes not leaving her face.

"Not long," Candy said, stepping back now that her job was done. "We didn't have to use any sedation so she should come around quickly."

All eyes were on her tiny face; the anticipation in the room was almost tangible. I was suddenly nervous- what if we had done something wrong? This thought made my body tense up. Jared felt this- he squeezed my hand gently.

Then her breathing changed- it was barely noticeable, but her chest was rising and falling more rapidly now. Doc noticed, too. He bent over her.

"Wanda?" he asked. "Can you hear me, Wanda?"

Her face twitched at the sound. I stepped slightly closer to her.

"Wanda. Come back. We aren't letting you go," I said with a firm voice that she would hopefully recognize. I could hear her breathing now, she was definitely waking up.

"Use the Awake," Candy suggested.

Doc quickly rummaged behind him to produce a little bottle. He sprayed a silvery cloud in front of her face. I saw her inhale it, then she took a deeper breath. I could see her struggling to find consciousness.

Ian then leaned over her- bent his head down so that his lips were next to her ear.

"Wanderer?" he said quietly, "We're all waiting for you, honey. Open your eyes." His voice was low and tender.

I could see her react to this- her breath caught at the sound of Ian's voice.

Ian saw this too- he lightly touched his lips to hers, then kissed her eyelids slowly. As he moved his head slightly back to look at her, her eyelids fluttered. I tightened my grip on Jared's hand as I leaned forward some more to see her better.

Jamie couldn't hold in his excitement.

"She's waking up!" he said, practically bouncing with happiness. I placed my hand on his shoulder to keep him from jumping right off the ground.

Wanda squinted in the light of the blue lanterns, looking disoriented and confused. Ian placed his free hand lightly on the side of her face.

"Wanderer?" he asked, leaning towards her again.

She focused on his face, and her eyes widened slightly in recognition.

"Ian?" she asked in Pet's high, sweet voice. "Ian, where am I?" She seemed frightened. "Who am I?"

**************

**A/Ns (as you can probably tell, I like to talk about my own writing. A lot. Don't feel obligated to read this if it bores you to no end, because I tend to ramble.)**

**-This is the part where it started getting VERY tedious to write. Because I was basically just using the book as a template, and re-working it so that it was from Mel's perspective. I still enjoyed writing this part, but it's hard to be creative when the plot is already set in stone. So I tried to work in stuff that would be unique to Melanie's perspective- you'll see more of that in the next chapter.**

**-This and Chapter 9 were originally one giant ending chapter, until I went back and realized how long it was. Not that I dislike long chapters, but most of the chapters of this story average two and a half pages on a word document, and I'm OCD enough to keep everything consistent.**

**-Completely random/boring bit of trivia: Melanie leaping into Jared's arms was inspired by Wuthering Heights, when Cathy "makes a leap for" Heathcliff and he catches her at some point in the book when they're reunited. I'm actually surprised I didn't make more literary references in this story, I'm a bit of a sucker for the classics (I read Pride and Prejudice twice in elementary school, need I say more?).**

**-I wish I had gotten more Kyle and Sunny into this, but this is from Mel's perspective and she doesn't pay quite as much attention to them as I would like. I finally caved and wrote a Kyle/Sunny one-shot, which I will be posting in the near future. Hooray!**


	9. Chapter 9

**So... last chapter. *sniffsniff* I've been putting off publishing this guy for a while because I really didn't want this story to end, but... it has to. I'm sorry. But I promise you guys this: If I DO miraculously get inspiration for a follow-up story, I'll write it and post it. **

Chapter 9

Ian smiled at the sound of her new voice.

"You're you," he stated simply. "And you're right where you belong."

She was still disoriented. She loosened one of her hands from Ian's and raised it to her face. Her hand stopped abruptly. She moved it again, and started shaking. Still confused and frightened. Her expression changed as she watched her hand open and close- she seemed to be thinking very hard now, her eyes unfocused.

Her mouth opened.

"Where is she?" She finally demanded. "Where is Pet?"

Of course Wanda would want to know where the sweet, defenseless soul was.

Doc moved; he reached for Pet's cryotank which was on the desk next to him, and lifted it carefully in his hands.

"She's right here," he said in an assuring voice, stepping forward slightly. "Tanked and ready to go. We thought you could tell us the best place to send her."

Wanda moved her head, searching. Her eyes rested on the glowing cryotank for a moment, and then they widened.

"Doc!" she gasped in a shocked, hurt voice. "Doc, you promised! You gave me your oath, _Eustance_!" She emphasized, staring accusingly at him. "Why? Why did you break your word?"

She was upset. Her body cringed, rigid with what must have been pain. I automatically leaned towards her frail-looking body, trying to think of a way to comfort her. She looked so delicate. Jared tightened his grip on my hand, reaching his other hand around my waist to ease my worry.

Doc shrugged.

"Even an honest man sometimes caves to duress, Wanda," he said complacently.

"Duress," Jared muttered. I looked at his face quick enough to see him roll his eyes.

"I'd say a knife to the throat counts as duress, Jared," Doc said, his eyebrows raised.

Jared shook his head. "You knew I wouldn't really use it," he said.

"That I did not," Doc stated. "You were quite persuasive."

"A knife?" Wanda whispered. I looked down at her; she was shaking- frightened again. Ian leaned his face towards her again.

"Shh, it's all okay," he said in a low voice, trying to calm her. She moved her hand to brush some strands of hair away from her face. "Did you really think you could leave us that way?" he asked, smiling slightly. "Wanda!" he sighed. He sounded relieved, though.

A spasm of sorrow crossed her face.

"I told you I didn't want to be a parasite," she whispered sadly.

That was it, I had to help her. And set things straight before she got any ideas about leaving again.

"Let me through," I ordered. I pried my hand out of Jared's and squeezed between Doc and Jeb so that I was standing next to her cot. She stared up at me with the strangest look of confused recognition on her face.

I was frank with her.

"Listen up, Wanda," I said, staring straight into her silvery gray eyes. "I know exactly what you don't want to be. But we're human, and we're selfish, and _we_ don't always do the right thing." Talking to her was very natural- it was easy for me to speak to her like I always had when I was her host. "We aren't going to let you go," I said. "Deal with it."

Her eyes widened again, taking me in.

"Mel?" she asked, shocked. "Mel, you're okay!"

Her surprise made me want to laugh. I smiled instead, and leaned down to wrap an arm around her delicate little shoulders.

"Of course I am," I informed her. "Wasn't that the point of all the drama? And you're going to be fine too," I continued. "We weren't stupid about it. We didn't just grab the first body we saw."

I felt Jamie squeeze in next to me to sit on the cot.

"Let me tell her, let me!" he said excitedly. He was bouncing again.

Wanda reached her hand out to take his. Her hand was small even in comparison with his.

"Jamie!" she sighed happily. I could tell her switch to a new body had not affected her love for my brother. For a moment I wondered how she would now feel about Jared. Jamie interrupted my thoughts.

"Hey, Wanda!" he exclaimed. "This is cool, isn't it? You're smaller than me now!" he said happily.

"But still older," Wanda began. "I'm almost-" she paused suddenly. "My birthday is in two weeks. I'll be eighteen."

I could feel the shock that must be showing on my face. She looked far too young to be eighteen, was she lying? I saw surprise flit over Ian's face as well- what did this mean to him? I had a good guess.

I looked at Wanda again- her expression had changed. She was thinking again. Jamie reached over to touch her face. Her eyes focused on him again.

"They let me come on the raid to get you," he said proudly.

"I know," she said, her eyebrows pulling together slightly. "I remember... Well, Pet remembers seeing you there." She shot a dark look at me accusingly. I shrugged it off.

"We tried not to scare her," Jamie explained to her. "She's so... kind of fragile-looking, you know?" He didn't wait for a reply. "And nice, too. We picked her out together, but I got to decide!" he seemed rather proud of this. He looked up at me. "See, Mel said we had to get someone young- someone who had a bigger percentage of life as a soul or something. But not too young, because she knew you wouldn't want to be a child." I tried not to smile at this. Jamie continued. "And then Jared liked this face, because he said no one could ever dis... _distrust_ it. You don't look dangerous at all," he added. "You look the opposite of dangerous. Jared said anyone who sees you would just naturally want to protect you, right, Jared?" He looked up at Jared, who stepped quietly behind me to slip his arm around my waist. Then Jamie turned smug. "But then I got the final say, because I was looking for someone who looked like _you_. And I thought this looked like you." He motioned towards Wanda's new body. "Because she sort of looks like an angel, and you're good like that. And real pretty. I knew you would be pretty."

He was grinning now. "Ian didn't come. He just sat here with you- he said he didn't care what you looked like." I saw Wanda's face soften when Jamie said this. "He wouldn't let anyone else put a finger on your tank at all, not even Mel. But Doc let me watch this time. It was way cool, Wanda," he said, unable to contain his innocent excitement. "I don't know why you wouldn't let me watch before. They wouldn't let me help though. Ian wouldn't let anyone touch you but him." He rolled his eyes, but Wanda didn't see, her eyes were on Ian.

Ian moved- he leaned forward until his lips were at her ear. I couldn't hear what he whispered to her, but it made Wanda's eyes well up with emotion. She sniffed.

"You like it, don't you?" Jamie asked her- his voice was suddenly high with anxiety. "You're not mad? There's nobody in there with you, is there?" he asked, his large eyes troubled. Wanda considered this.

"I'm not mad, exactly," she began, her voice was just a whisper. "And I- I can't find anybody else. Just Pet's memories. Pet's been here since..." she paused. "I can't remember when she wasn't here. I can't remember any other name."

I breathed a quiet sigh of relief at this- I doubt she heard it.

"You're not a parasite," I told her. I reached a hand down to touch her hair- each strand was like a fine thread of gold. "This body didn't belong to Pet, but there's nobody else to claim it. We waited to make sure, Wanda," I said to reassure her. "We tried to wake her up almost as long as we tried with Jodi."

Her expression changed again.

"Jodi? What happened to Jodi?" she said in a high, anxious voice. She tried to prop herself up on her elbows, and before I could help her Ian slipped his arm around her and easily pulled her up so that she was sitting. She looked around at everyone with wide eyes; her gaze lingered on Jared for a moment before she glanced back at me. I grimaced slightly, knowing it would be stupid to deny that her feelings for Jared lingered. But I wasn't mad at her- that had been my doing to begin with. I knew her love for him was a weak shadow of mine; I'd just have to deal with that, and so would she. Doc interrupted my thoughts.

"Jodi didn't respond," he said quietly, glancing at Kyle. "We kept trying as long as we could. We were able to keep her hydrated, but we had no way to feed her. We were worried about atrophy- her muscles, her brain..." he trailed off.

Wanda eyes were still scanning the circle of people surrounding her when she froze suddenly. She stared at Sunny, who was, as always, still attached to Kyle's side.

"Sunny!" she exclaimed, clearly delighted that the timid little soul was here with us.

"I got to stay," Sunny said quietly, a smile playing on her little lips. "Just like you." I saw her look up at Kyle, who still seemed a little subdued over Jodi. She could tell this wasn't how he usually was, and this made her lips turn down. "I'm trying though," she said sadly. "I am looking for her. I will keep looking."

Poor Sunny. I knew from Wanda's experiences with Jared how she probably felt right now- unsure of how Kyle truly felt about her, only knowing for sure that deep down he wanted his Jodi back more than he wanted to be with her. But he still held her close to him, and I knew that he didn't want to hurt the soul inside his lost love's body.

"Kyle had us put Sunny back when it looked like we would lose Jodi," Doc explained quietly.

Wanda blinked, seeming dazed by all of this, before her head turned to look at Ian, who was still supporting her with one arm. They stared at each other for a moment. It was strange seeing Ian's expression- it was almost identical to the anxious expression on Jared's face when I first woke up just barely over two weeks ago. But his eyes were still warm as he looked at her.

"You okay in there?" he asked, his eyes holding hers.

"I... I don't know," she began, seeming unsure of her answer. "This feels very... weird. Every bit as weird as switching species. So much weirder than I would have thought. I... I don't know."

I wanted to laugh- I had seen the bizarre planets she had once inhabited through her memories, could her body switch really be that disorienting? She looked so fragile, just sitting there. I could help her- we all could.

"You don't mind staying here _too_ much, do you Wanda?" Ian asked quietly, the hint of a smile on his lips. "Do you think that maybe you could tolerate it?"

Jamie reached for her hand and squeezed it lightly. I laid my hand on top of his. Even Jared leaned forward to cover my hand with his- I smiled at this, it looked like he still cared about Wanda even now that she was out of my body.

Wanda looked around at everyone surrounding her, absorbing everyone's expression. Her face was bright and beautiful. I saw Ian place his hand on her cheek- his hand was so big that it made her tiny face seem even smaller. Her eyes widened when he touched her; I wondered if it felt anything like how Jared touched me. She dropped her eyes shyly and her cheeks turned pink.

"I suppose I could do that. If it makes you happy," she whispered. Of course she would do something if it made someone _else_ happy.

"That's not good enough, actually," Ian said, seeming to be thinking along the same lines as me. "It has to make _you_ happy, too."

I was beginning to like Ian, now that his true love was no longer sharing a body with me.

Wanda looked up at him, then dropped her eyes again, her cheeks turning a deeper color.

"I... think it might," she said quietly, staring at her lap. "I think it might make me very, very happy." Her expression glowed as she said this. She wanted this, all of this. I could tell.

Ian's hand was still on her silvery cheek- he tilted her little face up until their eyes met. Their faces were identical expressions of hope and happiness.

"Then you will stay."

He leaned forward then, and pressed his lips to hers. In that moment, I saw the lives of everyone I loved laid out before me. The choices that we make follow us for the rest of our existence, and the choices that we had made would forever bring joy to our lives. Somehow the tangled mess that I had grown accustomed to had resolved itself into near perfection. I felt Jared's arm tighten around my waist- felt him nuzzle my neck, and the heat of his touch made my whole body feel warmer. The days ahead of us might not all be easy, but we had each other, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

"I will stay," Wanda whispered.

*******

**Well... that's all, folks. *sob* I'd like to say a few things, so if you'll bear with me...**

**To all of you who have taken the time to read and review my story: THANK YOU. It means a lot to me. The positive feedback I've received has really boosted my confidence as a writer, and I'll definitely be writing more stuff in the future (hint hint I just posted a new one-shot called "First Night", maybe you should read it hint hint). I LOVE YOU GUYS!**


	10. A note

Hello all! I've noticed that my stories have been getting a lot more traffic lately, probably due to The Host coming out in theaters soon (I'm so excited!). I've been meaning to do this for a while, but since there's likely going to be a new wave of readers, I'm going to be going back and editing my work.

The edits won't be anything major, but I posted this when I was just out of high school—I'm about to graduate from college now, I have quite a few writing classes under my belt, and I've grown as a writer.

If you're afraid I'll change the story a lot—or if you're just nostalgic and possessive like I am—feel free to save my stuff before I change it (flagfic is a good website for converting fanfiction to ebooks or PDFs). You should have plenty of time to do this, as I'm rather busy and won't be replacing the chapters with edited versions immediately. Also, if you have any suggestions that you haven't already voiced in the reviews, do let me know. I'd be happy to take them into consideration.

That's all for now. I hope you're all doing well, and I hope you like the edits I make.


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